This was the challenge issued Saturday Night:
Contest time: best "it is so hot outside..." or "your momma
is so fat" joke that makes me laugh wins gift card.
We had so many responses on twitter and Facebook that I wanted
to give each of you the opportunity to vote. Simply comment below
your favorite number. On Monday morning we will add them all up and
give away some gift cards.
First Place: $100
Second Place: $50
Third Pace: $25
Get voting now. Tell your friends, your buddies, your coworkers
whoever you want. Get them voting and win! Good Luck.
1) Victoria Brewer - It's hotter than 2
fat girls looking for a skittle in a Volkswagen .
2) Kimberly Anne Rabe - Your momma is so fat
she needs a parade permit to walk down the street!!
3) Marsha Kitchen - Its hotter than a two
4) Michael Markey - It's so hot outside, you
could boil an egg still in the chicken.
5 ) Jeff Vest - Yo mama' so fat she's
got her own zipcode
6) Michael White - Your momma is so fat that
the shadow she casts lowers the temperature by 20 degree's.
7) Matt Leachman - It's so hot outside I saw a
squirrel cooling his nuts in a freezer
8) Jeff Duncan - Your momma is so fat she sat
on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington's nose.
9) Erik Pitner - Your momma is so fat...she has
to turn around twice in the shower to wet her back.
10) Erik Pitner - Momma so fat...she
thinks gravy is a beverage.
11) Cathy Sharpe - It is so hot
outside...I feel like a whore in church.
12) Scott Ellis - It's soooo hot outside
even Mitt Romney seems cool!
13) Janice Gray - Its so hot outside, Scotty's
mofo sauce would cool me off!
14) Matt Leachman - Your momma is so fat she
broke her leg and gravy poured out
15) Kyle Sanders - It's so hot
outsidie that your mama is sweating MoFo sauce, and she is dipping
wings in it.
16) Maryka Hodson Napier - A woman walks
into a bar, and she has a duck under her arm. The bartender asks ,
whats the pigs name? Woman says this is a duck! Bartender says, no,
I was asking the duck!!
17) Scott Ellis - It's sooo hot outside
Optimus Prime turned into an air conditioner!
18) Steven Amos - It is so hot outside
that Chuck Norris started to sweat and...........Wait a second,
Chuck Norris has never sweated a day in his life. He is as cold as
ice dipped in liquid nitrogen.
19) Jenni Butler - Your momma is so fat
she had to be baptized at sea world!
20) Don Arney - Yo momma's so fat, she
stepped on the dog's tail and it died.
21) Maryka Hodson Napier - Your mama is so
fat, she has more Chins than a Chinese phone book!
22) Chris Raflik - It is so hot outside
my ball sack is sticking to my feet!
23) Scott Ellis - It's so hot Siri asked
to stay inside!
24) Sarah Ann Fleenor - It is so hot
outside the ice cream truck just melted.
25) Quinn Gilbert - its so hot out...i
saw a fire hydrant ask a dog to pee on it...
26) Matt Wallpe - It's so hot... hot air
balloons can't rise.
27) Kat Hesselgrave - Your momma is so fat
she wears neck deoderant
28) Robin Roller - It's so hot outside
that yo momma used to be fat....
29) Matt Wallpe - It's so hot... I saw a
funeral procession in a Dairy Queen drive through.
30) Shawn Quick Raflik - Your Momma is so
fat, when she goes outside on a hot day the sweat starts flying
& the neighborhood kids run around her like a sprinkler.
31) Dwight Snethen - It's so hot, I'm
sweating like Snooki in church.
32) Bradley G Hood - It's so hot Satan
thinks he finally got all mankind in his court....he's in for big
33) Kristi Johnson Hamblin - Your momma so
fat, she bungee jumped and went straight to HELL !
34) Andrew Personett - It's so hot because
your fat momma's gravity pulled the sun too close
35) Jason Preston - Your momma's so fat,
she's earnin' dill chips money by providing shade to kids at the
36) Kurt Brehm - Yo momma so fat, when
she goes to the zoo, the elephants throw peanuts at her!
37) Keyla D. Lane - It's so hot outside,
the ducks at the park come in two varieties: "original recipe" and
38) Sally Bannister - it is so hot outside
farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from
laying hard-boiled eggs
39) Adam Garrett - Your mother's so fat,
when she goes to a restaurant she doesn't get a menu, she gets an
40) Jennifer Godar - It's hotter than two
squirrels screwing in a wool sock (from my husband)!
41) Jeni Billenstein - It's so hot
even Mayor Mike Bloomberg is drinking a Big Gulp!
42) Brady Jackson - It's so hot that
Scotty is saving money on electricity by frying dill chips on the
43) Stacey Moran - It's hotter outside
than a lonely housewife reading Fifty Shades of Grey at a Magic
Mike Screening! ;)
44) Bryan PfishinMagician Hill - It's
hotter than the hinges on the gates of Hell....
45) Matt Wallpe - It's so hot... the
National Weather Service issued a fat chic in a tank top
46) Sally Bannister - your momma is so fat
she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on
47) Tami Boyle Clark - It's so hot, I saw
a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking!! :)
48) Franco Dattilo - Its so hot that hell
called and asked for its weather back!
49) Phil Wrighthouse - It's so hot, Paris
Hilton just shot herself. "My catchphrase is redundant," the
suicide note said.
50) Sarah Hill - Your mama so fat, she cut
herself and gravy came out.
51) Steven Toberman - Your mommas so fat
the oil company bought her some heels to help them strike oil!!
52) Phil Wrighthouse - Dated Joke Alert:
Your momma's so fat, she put on a pair of BVDs and, when se was
done, they said "Boulevard."
53) Tami Boyle Clark - It's so hot, I saw
an Amish guy buying an air conditioner!
54) Roger Jr Fuller - Its hotter than a 1
legged woman in a kick butt contest
55) Craig McCarty - Yo momma's so fat I
told her we won the Super Bowl and she walked outside with a
56) Jessica Lynn Hendricks Phelps It is so
hot outside that i feel like i am reading fifty shades of gray at a
magic mike screening.
57) Andrew Personett - It's so hot you
could fry bacon in your fat moms armpits
58) Jessica Logsdon - Your Mom is so fat,
when she went to the top of the St. Louis Arch it turned into a
59) Brad Lyle - It's so hot outside that I
thought about going somewhere else for a cold beer
60) Tami Boyle Clark - Yo momma's so
fat....her cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard~
61) Nathan Trissel - Its so hot
outside....I saw a fire hydrant chasing a Dalmatian!
62) Shawn Quick Raflik - It's so hot
outside that if a Ginger goes outside they will spontaneously
63) Tami Boyle Clark - yo mommas so
fat....she got in a monster truck and turned it into a
64) Michael Roque - Yo mommaso fat she
fell and broke her leg and mofo sauce poured out
65) Clint McCullough - Yo mama so fat she
left the house wearing high heels and came back wearing flip
66) Tami Boyle Clark - Yo momma's so
fat...... I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still
67) JaymeSteve Herrmann - Your momma so fat she
has more rolls than a bakery !
68) Emily Brunette Mitchell - It is so
outside that when I bit into my dill chips, I thought I was eating
frozen pickles! :)
69) Steve Strip Strippoli - It's hotter
than a $3 pistol on a Saturday night
70) Brad Shanks - its so hot out i am
sweating like obama looking for his birth certificate.
71) Erin Erdmann - Your momma's so fat
when she wears yellow she changes the weather
72) Christine Corn Stinson - It's so
hot....I got a sunburn just watching the weather report.
73) Angela Hancock Hill - It's so hot
outside the squirrels are holding their nuts with oven mitts.
74) Mary Hires - it's so hot outside I saw
Optimus Prime transform into an air conditioner
75) Andrew Personett - Your momma's so fat
she has to bathe at Sea World and uses Shamoo as a bath toy.
76) Fran Pawlowski - It is so hot outside
that the fish are gettin fried right in the water!
77) Becky Kormos - its so hot im sweatin
like a whore in chuch.
78) Rusty Gerritson - your mommas sooo
fat....when she bends over....we enter daylight savings time
79) Rusty Gerritson - your mommas so
fat....when i tell her to haul ass....she has to make 2 trips!
80) Ron Smith - its so hot the workers at
the chicken place were jumping in the fry vat just to cool
81) Andrew Personett - Your momma's so fat
she douches with a fire hydrant
82) Rusty Gerritson - your mommas so
fat...after sex she smokes a ham!
83) Chris Raflik - Your Momma is so fat
the she already busted 7 kiddie pools and has you going to Walmart
for another one.
84) Nick Caldwell - Yo momma so fat she
makes jabba the hut look anorexic
85) Sarah Parish - Yo momma's so fat she
sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out.
86) Katie Hooper - Its hotter than 2 rats
screwing in a wool sock on a tin roof in August! (from my cousins
87) Beth Ayen - It's so hot you can wash
and dry your clothes at the same time
88) Krista McGuire Deschamp - its so hot
out your wife is confused and seeing fireworks for the fourth time
in your marriage.
89) JD Sams - Yo momma so ugly she went to
the haunted house and they give the bitch an application.
90) Morgan Ellis - Your momma's so fat she
saw a school bus & thought it was a Twinkie!
91) Bryce Williams - It's so hot outside,
yo momma looks PHAT!
92) Shane Ecker - Yo momma's so fat, when
she fell down, she rocked herself to sleep trying to get back
93) Jordan Amanda - It's so hot outside,
when yo mama stood up, her tramp stamp stayed on her lawn
94) Nicole Didot - Its so hot my sweat has
sweat! Just sayn!
95) Nadia Zahedi - It's so hot outside I
drank a glass of the MoFo sauce to cool off!
96) Erin Bangel - It's so HOT outside
I saw squirrels fanning their nuts!!! HAHHA!
97) Nelly Montoya - It's so HOT outside
the COWS are giving EVAPORATED MILK!
98) Nelly Montoya - yo MOMMA So FAT the
back of her NECK looks like a pack of HOTDOGS!!
99) Peggy Newman Herrod - it's so hot that
i really prefer menopause.
100) Joshua Williams - It is so hot the
fountains are producing steam instead of water.
101) Andrew Personett - It's so hot
outside your momma sweats bacon grease
102) Collin Hufhand - Your mom is so fat
that she perspires mayonnaise.
103) Tom Milcarek - it's so hot out I saw
an amish woman wearing a pair of Daisy Duke's !
104) Chris Summers - It's so hot outside,
I'm sweating like a fat chick writing love letters.
105) Randy Cook - Your momma so fat, when
she dances at a concert, the whole band skips...HAHA!
106) Amy Barbaro Coats - It's so hot
outside that when I turn the hose on, even the water didn't want to
107) Amy Barbaro Coats - It's so hot
outside, Earth & Wind gave in to Fire. 'You win!'
108) Nancy Schmoll Paul - Yo mama's so fat
when she died she broke the stairway to heaven
109) Tracy Stokes Concannon - It's so hot
out, your mama's sweatin' like the fountain at the Bellagio!
110) Amy Barbaro Coats - It's so hot
outside that I heard the ground praying for another great
111) Debbie Rench Dorman - Its hotter than
a jalapenos coochie!
112) Chad McCauley - Your momma's so fat,
when she bends over it looks like two pigs wrestling over milk
113) Stacy Renee White - It's so hot
farmers are feeding ice chips to their chickens so they don't
deliver hard boiled eggs.
114) Kelsey Holloway - It's so hot, I'm
sweating more than a whore in a church...
115) Emily Smriga Blue - It's so hot
outside that Dick Cheney water boarded himself!
116) Emily Smriga Blue - It's so hot I'm
sweating like a priest at a little league game! (sorry, not PC)
117) Sharon Kay Smith - It is so hot, I
hear weeping and knashing of teeth!
118) Vicki Sakha Dickerson - Yo mama so
fat she irons her pants on the driveway!
119) Tony A. Patterson - Your mom is so
fat the other moms in the neighborhood orbit around her caught by
her gravitational pull.
120) Jeremy Ross - Yo momma so fat her
blood type is gravy!
121) Vicki Sakha Dickerson - Yo momma so
fat she was standing in a corner when a police officer walked by
and said "break it up!"
122) Vicki Sakha Dickerson - Yo momma so
fat she uses a VCR as a pager!
123) Jeremy Ross - Yo momma so fat, her
belt size is equator
124) Chally Sorrell - Abbott Your momma is
so fat when she broke her leg gravy poured out !!!!
125) Jeremy Ross - Yo momma so fat,
that after sex I rolled over twice and i was STILL on top of
126) Sunny Currier - It's hotter than
127) Vicki Sakha Dickerson - It's so hot
it feels like the devil just farted.
128) Dwight Snethen - It's so hot, even
Satan said I'm getting the hell out of here.
129) Sherry Rhorer - Your momma so fat she
gets out bed on both sides
130) Tom Jessee - It's so hot, the cows
are giving powdered milk!!
131) Tom Jessee - It's so hot, the catfish
have ticks on 'em!
132) Leigha Forte - Yo momma so fat she's
on both sides of the family!
133) Jeff Lloyd - It's so hot outside I
paid yo fat momma to stand in front of my house to block the
134) Shaina Allman - Yo mama so fat she
uses diet soap!
135) Jeff Bugher - It's so hot outside,
when I lit my grill I felt a blast of cool air.
136) Joshua Young - Yo mommas so fat she
uses cheat codes for the wii fit!
137) Jeff Guenther - It's so hot the kids
wore out the water in the local pool.
138) Jeni Billenstein - It's so hot the
Amish are wearing mini skirts
139) Cheryl Lee Cockrum - You know it's
hot when the bees are using the dog's water dish for a hot tub.
140) Michael Charlton - Your mommas so fat
she fell in love and broke it
141) Michael Charlton - Your mommas so fat
she jumped in the air and got stuck.
142) Kirk K Rich - it is so hot outside we
all stood in the shade and thanked you cause your momma is so
143) Rick Whitmore - it so hot outside
that your mom slipped in her own sweat and fell on a manhole cover,
when she got up there was a circle of fried bacon on her
144) Pam Luke - It's so hot outside
Scotty's hot wings are ashamed to call themselves HOT!
145) @Buckeyepharmd - your momma is so
fat she was born April 4th, 5th and 6th.
146) @andrewevans843 - its so hot outside
I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking
147) @cubsfan317 - yo momma so fat Darth
Vader modeled the death star after her
148) @Crowd0503 - its so hot I saw two
trees fighting over a dog. Also its so hot I say a chicken lay an
149) @hofmann - it's so hot, even Mitt
Romney is complaining about global warming.
150) @cawilkey1 - it's so hot outside
that Jesus has started to turn water into beer and
151) @pda1313 - It's so hot outside my
balls are sticking to YOUR leg
152) @ToyotaJeff - Yo mama so fat, when
she talks to herself it's a long distance call.
153) @pda1313 - Yo mama so fat instead of
an STD she gave me cholestorol
154) @taylor1529 - it's so hot Gov.
Daniels stepped outside and burned his combover.
155) @pda1313 - Yo mama so fat she has
more crack than Whitney and Bobby
156) @ansonpc - you're mama is so hot
even her fat is pretty...see what i did there!
157) @halfpoint22 - It's so hot outside, I
just saw a bird using a potholder to pull a worm out of the
158) @Kevin_Swiontek - It's so hot outside
your momma isn't fat anymore!
159) @sportnsound - it is so hot outside
that even Al Gore cant believe how right he was about Global
160) @Kgbinder - It is so hot outside even
Satan turns on the AC.
161) @ChanningKing - It's so hot Charlie
Sheen told his doctor he has an Indy sensation when he pees.
162) @jpschust - Personal favorite: your
momma's so fat when she turns around people give her a welcome back
163) @HenryHoward - It's so hot outside I
need some Mo Fo sauce to cool down.
164) @Indyweather24 - It is so hot outside
I saw a fire hydrant begging a dog to pee on it
165) @AUBillyGoat32 - It's so hot
today..the National Weather Service has issued a fat guy in tank
166) @alissabirkel - it's so hot i just
saw a chicken lay an omelet.
167) @Cantplaypiano - It's so hot out a
cactus offered me a glass of water